I’m back home after an eventful 3 days. This post may not be completely coherent, so please bear with me. 🙂
This week was Camp Bluebird. This is a 3 day gathering for adult cancer survivors. Some of us are not currently living with cancer. Will it come back? Sometimes the uncertainty is just hard to live with. Some survivors are living with their disease, and the outcome is not clear. Will the cancer kill me? How much time do I have? I saw people doing beautiful, creative living beyond their fear. They were loving each other, their surroundings, and being a safe place for people who needed one desperately. The days weren’t filled with sadness, although there were tears at times. It was an incredible, wonderful joy to see that there IS still joy in their lives.
I’m going to share my audio recording of the first moments we came together. It will show as video, but I couldn’t figure out how to do it right. I just needed to capture the parade of us with kazoos and recorders and castanets. I was being pushed in my wheelchair and shaking my castanets. I hope the audio captures it well enough.
Then tonight my friend Mary and I went to see Elizabeth Gilbert speak here in Asheville on her Big Magic tour. Liz completely blows the top off the typical ways of approaching your artistic work and challenges us to think of the whole process in a different way. She encourages us to show up for our work as though it was our paid day job work, but not to expect our creativity to pay the bills. Creativity simply comes and goes, and we do with it what we will. It’s not a bad thing…it’s just a thing that is being asked to do something it was never meant to do. Give someone a career and a living. It is meant to give someone joy to make something out of nothing, as many times as you can and will.
I still have so much reflection to do, but I am going to have to work on my mindset because it isn’t a healthy way to approach something I love so much.